Category: blog

Book

Today’s word was book.  I thought it was kind of funny. Believe it or not, I have started writing a book.  The first chapter is finished.  But I may change the style of it.  We’ll see if I complete it.

The book is about the past.  It starts in the early 1900’s with the birth of Cindy. Cindy is the oldest of 4 girls on a farm in Northern Missouri. Cindy grows up and attends the state school for teaching.  There she meets her future husband Larry.  They both return to their homes after graduating and start their teaching careers.  Cindy teaches elementary children and Larry teaches high school math.  The ending will be bittersweet.

This book could lead into more projects.  We shall see…..

 

Teach

Teach was the word of the day.  I was really struggling on what to write about the word teach, because it brings many painful feelings.  Not feelings about past teachers I’ve had.  I was blessed with many wonderful teachers along the way.  I even decided that teaching was my calling in life.  It hasn’t exactly panned out the way I wished.  That is where the pain resides.

Finally, I have decided to write about what social isolation has taught me.  Tomorrow is the month mark of when our governor has placed the stay-at-home order.

My first reaction was unbelief.  I was not able to work and have income.  Our tax rebate was in my checking account, so I knew I would be able to pay my share of the bills for a month or two.  I have been very blessed that my husband is still working.

Next, I was enjoying the time home.  It’s been great spending time with my son.  I’ve been cooking more than I have in years.

I began to convert back into my introverted ways.  I was thinking that I didn’t need to deal with any people at all.  I thought I was okay…

My family of 3 had a nice day at home yesterday on Easter.  We had a delicious meal.  I was allowed to pick out one movie and my husband sat and watched it with me.

Then today happened.  I began to struggle.

I decided I needed some contact with friends.  I set up a zoom meeting and invited 4 friends.  Unfortunately one gal was not able to attend.

I called the meeting “Happy Hour”.  I told everyone to grab the beverage of their choice and join in at 3:30. It was closer to 4 by the time everyone was able to log in.  But now we all know how it works and we’re going to try again in a few days.  It was a pretty nice time.

So, as I sat down typing out this article, it has hit me that I am ready for this isolation to be over.  I miss talking to people.  But I am going to change a few things.  I am going to be myself.  I’m not going to be the person other people want me to be.  I’m just going to be me.  That is what I have learned.

 

 

 

Shining My Light for All

The sun shining light after a long winter.

As a young girl I attended Sunday School on a regular basis.  One of the songs I learned in church was called, “This Little Light of Mine.” Here is the link to a video in case you haven’t heard it. https://youtu.be/yRhDi2aK5ac. I used to sing it all the time.  If you just listened to the video, now I’m sure you’ll be singing it now as well.  The song is about letting your light shine for the world .  Don’t let the world blow your light out, rejoice and always be delightful.  We were taught to be forgiving and to never show anger.  As a child, you might not have been allowed to have disagreements with your parents and siblings.  You might have been stopped before you could get your feelings off your chest.

 

This way of living as a child may have brought serious consequences as an adult.  Maybe you had trouble saying no to others when they asked you to do something. Maybe you thought you had to be perfect and needed approval from those around you.  If you didn’t get the approval, you might have felt like a complete failure.

 

Does any of this sound familiar?  Dealing with failures in life is a difficult process to overcome.    Sometimes it’s really hard to dig deep within yourself to find that small flicker of light.  We must learn to accept what cannot change and move on with new experiences.  It’s hard.

 

I’m finding my light within me during this stay-at=home order by our governor.  My son is home from college taking his courses online.  I am so thankful for this time we are spending together.  When he is struggling in Calc 2, I try to give him some positive vibes to help him deal with it.  He does the same for me if I’m struggling. We have been getting along better than ever.  I will be sad to see it end and I know he will soon move on.  But for now, we are shinning our light on each other.