Teach

Teach was the word of the day.  I was really struggling on what to write about the word teach, because it brings many painful feelings.  Not feelings about past teachers I’ve had.  I was blessed with many wonderful teachers along the way.  I even decided that teaching was my calling in life.  It hasn’t exactly panned out the way I wished.  That is where the pain resides.

Finally, I have decided to write about what social isolation has taught me.  Tomorrow is the month mark of when our governor has placed the stay-at-home order.

My first reaction was unbelief.  I was not able to work and have income.  Our tax rebate was in my checking account, so I knew I would be able to pay my share of the bills for a month or two.  I have been very blessed that my husband is still working.

Next, I was enjoying the time home.  It’s been great spending time with my son.  I’ve been cooking more than I have in years.

I began to convert back into my introverted ways.  I was thinking that I didn’t need to deal with any people at all.  I thought I was okay…

My family of 3 had a nice day at home yesterday on Easter.  We had a delicious meal.  I was allowed to pick out one movie and my husband sat and watched it with me.

Then today happened.  I began to struggle.

I decided I needed some contact with friends.  I set up a zoom meeting and invited 4 friends.  Unfortunately one gal was not able to attend.

I called the meeting “Happy Hour”.  I told everyone to grab the beverage of their choice and join in at 3:30. It was closer to 4 by the time everyone was able to log in.  But now we all know how it works and we’re going to try again in a few days.  It was a pretty nice time.

So, as I sat down typing out this article, it has hit me that I am ready for this isolation to be over.  I miss talking to people.  But I am going to change a few things.  I am going to be myself.  I’m not going to be the person other people want me to be.  I’m just going to be me.  That is what I have learned.